We have been teaching our boys about the difference between actions done accidentally and those done intentionally. This is a complex concept, especially for children who may struggle to fully understand cause and effect or the complete control they have over their bodies. For instance, kicking a soccer ball and accidentally hitting your brother in the head can be considered an accident—these things happen without intention or planning. In contrast, if one brother gets angry and pushes the other off the trampoline on purpose, even if it happens suddenly, it still has a specific intent to cause harm.
Here is a recent scenario from the Condos household (I will withhold the identity of the offending party):
Me: You can’t hit your brother, even if he makes you angry.
Boy: I didn’t know I was going to hit him… it was an accident.
Me: Did you make a fist with your hand?
Boy: Yes.
Me: Did you pull your arm back to punch harder?
Boy: Yes.
Me: Did he make you angry or frustrated?
Boy: Yes, he wasn’t listening to me.
Me: Then it wasn’t an accident. You might not have meant to hurt him, but your actions indicated that you were planning to do something to cause harm.
Our brains function like complex supercomputers. We can perform quick calculations, even in the heat of the moment. While it’s easy to label most of our actions as unintentional reactions to our circumstances, if we are honest with ourselves, we will realize that we have more control over our actions than we might think. In the scenario with my kids, by looking at the intentions behind their actions rather than just the actions themselves, I gain valuable insight into the situation.
We see interesting passages in God’s laws for the people of Israel related to intentionality. Some of the more obscure passages directly address this concept. Take, for example, the straightforward issue of murder: even God made provisions to distinguish between actions that were accidental and those that were intentional.
In Numbers 35:20-28, it states: “So if someone hates another person and pushes him or throws a dangerous object at him and he dies, it is murder. Or if someone hates another person and hits him with his fist and he dies, it is murder. In such cases, the avenger must put the murderer to death when they meet. But suppose someone pushes another person without having shown previous hostility, or throws something that unintentionally hits another person, or accidentally drops a huge stone on someone, though they were not enemies, and the person dies. If this should happen, the community must follow these regulations in making a judgment between the slayer and the avenger, the victim’s nearest relative: The community must protect the slayer from the avenger and must escort the slayer back to live in the city of refuge to which he fled. There, he must remain until the death of the high priest, who was anointed with the sacred oil.”
What if you accidentally dropped a huge stone on someone? This scenario is plausible, especially considering how ancient people constructed buildings. However, God understood that such accidents could occur, so He established guidelines for a jury to distinguish between accidental actions and malicious ones. The passage also reveals that even accidental actions have consequences; the individual who unintentionally takes a life is still required to move to a city of refuge and live there until the high priest’s death.
When it comes to my boys, even if they accidentally hit their brother with a ball, there are still consequences. Whether someone was careless or someone got hurt, we should take a moment to calm down our emotions.
This passage serves as a reminder to us all. We should consider the consequences or unintended fallout of our actions, even when they occur accidentally. This also means we should strive to live as intentionally as possible, considering the outcomes of our choices, walking in the Spirit, and exercising self-control in our lives.
One final thought concerning intentionality and accidents: when we harbor anger and malice in our hearts (which applies to all sins), we are more likely to take actions that lead to severe unintended consequences. Though we may not always be aware of these consequences, they are still present, which is why Jesus gives us this instruction.
In Matthew 12:35-37, He says: “The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. I tell you, on the day of judgment, people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
We should understand that we all must account for even the words we say, as they stem from what we are storing in our hearts. Thankfully, for those in Christ, His blood covers us from all unrighteousness; however, this does not exempt us from practicing intentionality and avoiding harmful accidents.